Growing Up

Growing up, I have realized, is about figuring out two things.

The art of human interaction. As a grown-up, you are thrust into a complex web of relationships. You have to figure out how you will partner, collaborate, communicate, commiserate, conspire, compromise, debate, haggle, and argue with other grown-ups. How you will lead, motivate, mentor, teach, entertain, support, tolerate, appreciate, and sometimes disappoint others. How you will learn from, get inspired by, tell stories to, and enjoy the company of your peers. Kids, on the other hand, do their own thing in their own world and, occasionally, tolerate adult interruptions.

The choreography of time. When you’re young, someone else structures your day – from wake-up time to meal times, from school classes to extracurriculars, and from playtime to bedtime. As a grown-up, you have to figure out how to structure your day. You need to look ahead and think about what a future version of you will appreciate. Both a near-future version of you (“what will I eat for lunch?”) and a distant-future version of you (“where do I want to spend this winter?”). You have to figure out the best way to prioritize, create a schedule, and then follow-through on your plan.

Getting good at these — navigating relationships and orchestrating time — is the key to a high-quality, fulfilling life. It is also exhausting to do consistently day after day and year after year.

This is why growing up sucks.